Marriage & Couple Counselling and Therapy

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“A deep sense of love and belonging is an irreducible need of all men, women, and children. We are biologically, cognitively, physically, and spiritually wired to love, to be loved, and to belong”
– Brene Brown

Human beings are social creatures. Strong and healthy relationships are central to our happiness, health and wellbeing. With positive relationships, we feel valued, purposeful, happier and healthier. For many, one of the most significant relationships in our life is that with our partner.

Similarities between the partners help in connecting, but the differences can also be complementary and enriching for the relationship. Yet the differences can pose challenges for the relationship if a couple struggles to navigate these differences in a way that works for the relationship.

Such differences are part and parcel of a relationship since each partner comes from a different background with different upbringing and experiences that shape how each sees the world and those around them. This directly or indirectly also influences how one may choose to respond to the situations one finds oneself in to best meet his or her needs, and this may differ between partners. When not understood, such differences may lead to conflicts and unhelpful interaction dynamics in the relationship. This may in turn lead to feelings of stress, doubts, loneliness, confusion and anger. The couple may further disconnect as conflicts escalate, arguments become frequent, or avoidant behaviour starts to take root and be present in the couple’s lives.

While we feel the innate need for human connection, the ability to form and maintain healthy, loving and supportive relationships requires a great deal of openness to learning, communication, commitment and understanding. With counselling and therapy and the willingness to be open to the process, couples have grown to better understand each other, improve communication, and mutually support each other in the face of life and family challenges together.

Who We Help

Regardless of the nature of the relationship struggles and how long the issues have been present in the relationship, therapy and counselling can benefit you, your partner and your relationship. At In Focus, we offer relationship counselling, couple counselling and marriage counselling to couples in different stages of their relationship and also across all types of intimate relationships.

Our couple counselling and therapy services are open to individuals and couples regardless of background, ethnicity, nationality, marital status and also to LGBT individuals.

When Therapy & Counselling Can Be Beneficial For Your Relationship or Marriage

Issues that arise in a couple relationship and where counselling and therapy will be helpful include the following:

  • Communication problems
  • Lack of intimacy – emotional and / or physical
  • Emotional distance
  • Frequent conflicts and arguments
  • Struggles in resolving conflicts
  • Infidelity, betrayal and trust issues
  • Differences in values and perspectives such as in parenting, lifestyle and decision-making
  • Substance abuse or addictions
  • Interpersonal difficulties with in-laws
  • Crisis such as a major health concern of a partner / parents, or an impending loss in the family
  • Financial issues
  • Mental health issues associated with the relationship
  • Difficulty bringing up an important issue to the partner
  • Something feels amiss in the relationship, but unable to identify the issue
Counselling Session - Marriage Counseling

Besides seeking help when relationship challenges arise, therapy and counselling can also help at different stages of a relationship.

  • Early stages of relationship: This is a wonderful time to build the foundation for an enduring and satisfying relationship. Couple counselling can help the couple to strengthen the partnership through helping both parties enhance their understanding of each other and developing the skills and openness for good communication, conflict resolution and joint problem solving.
  • Relationship review: Sometimes, one may feel uncertain about the next steps in the relationship. Couple counselling helps both parties evaluate their relationship and their relationship goals together and the choices involved, e.g. whether to officialise a union, whether to relocate, whether to bring the relationship to an end etc.
  • Family issues: If issues revolve around the children or other family members, additional family therapy is also available and may be recommended by your counsellor or therapist where appropriate.

Give Your Relationship The Chance It Deserves

Making a choice to attend couples counselling is an important step in a relationship. Yet it is understandable that this may be a difficult topic to bring up to your partner since it involves acknowledging that the relationship needs help. If the relationship struggles have been long standing or if past attempts at relationship counselling were not as successful as one hoped for, it is understandable that there is another layer of reservations.

Nonetheless, every relationship deserves a chance. Relationship building takes intentionality and also involves confronting one’s own fears and issues. Taking that step is key to starting or restarting the process towards personal growth, alongside growing together with your partner to restore, repair and revitalise the relationship and one’s own well-being.

Couple Counselling Sessions

How We Can Help

At In Focus, our counsellors and therapists understand how this may be challenging but we also firmly believe that with the right professional support and therapeutic environment, we can help you and your partner work through the difficulties in your relationship.

We provide a supportive, respectful, confidential, and non-judgmental safe space for both parties to express one’s deepest concerns and feelings. These conversations will be hard but our professional counsellors and therapists will facilitate and help each other through this process.

Informed by a combination of approaches like Choice Theory Reality Therapy (CTRT), Emotion-focused Therapy (EFT) or Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT), Systemic Therapy and other therapeutic approaches, our counsellors and therapists will be able to help you and your partner build stronger bonds, deepen mutual understanding and re-ignite the connection that may have been missing for some time.

Hold Hand Marriage Counselling Services

We believe that counselling and therapy is collaborative. Facilitated and guided by a professional counsellor or therapist at In Focus, in partnership with clients’ personal commitment and intentionality for change and growth, couples who have been through couple or marriage counselling and therapy find themselves experiencing the following:

  • A common appreciation of what the relationship means to both parties
  • A stronger bond between both parties
  • A better understanding of the interaction patterns and dynamics between the parties and the deeper causes
  • New perspectives that help both parties see themselves and each other with more empathy and compassion
  • Growth in learning more positive and healthier alternatives to manage and resolve conflicts
  • Empowerment in changing the interaction dynamics and developing new dynamics helpful for the relationship
  • Where trust had been previously broken, reparation from hurt experienced and re-establishment of trust
  • Clarity of goals that both parties desire for the relationship and their future together
  • Renewed joy, love, satisfaction and meaning in life and in the relationship

It can feel frustrating in such situations. It is possible that we work with you towards the goal of improving the relationship. At the same time, it is equally important for us to explore your challenges faced in engaging the other person. It is part of the work in relationship counselling to strengthen communication to improve your relationship.

It can feel overwhelming experiencing someone’s aggression or violence. You do not need to suffer alone. There is help available for you and your partner. By reaching out to us, you can learn ways to cope and your partner can also explore ways to manage his or her anger but also the root of the anger in a safe environment. In such instance, couple or family counselling is not recommended. Instead, individual counselling is encouraged and it is possible for both of you to work towards a healthier relationships.

Contact us today to find out more about couple counselling or marriage counselling at In Focus to know how we can support you and your partner in this season of your relationship, and grow towards fulfilling your potential to flourish and thrive in life.

ABOUT US

At In Focus, we empathise with our clients as they go through myriad of life’s problems, stresses and challenges which are overwhelming at times. As these happened to us too. The only difference is, it is our profession to help others overcome these life hurdles so as to live life to the fullest.

OUR SERVICES

We have a range of services available for your consideration depending on your needs. You can get in touch with us for coaching services, corporate consultation, professional training, counselling and psychotherapy services. Please visit our services page to see what we offer.

CONTACT US

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Chan Pei Lin

Master of Guidance and Counselling (MGC)

Counsellor Masters in Guidance and Counselling (MGC), James Cook University Bachelor of Arts (Psychology), University of Buffalo New York State

I have always had a keen interest in working with children and youth. I find it fulfilling and meaningful to be working, supporting and guiding them, and I now have more than eight years of experience in this area. After graduating from the University of Buffalo, New York State with a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology, I started working with children and youth with Special Needs in early intervention. From my interactions with my clients over these years, I have come to see that being able to provide the emotional support that they and their families need is very important.

Being diagnosed with dyslexia and tactile defensives (Sensory Integrative Disorder), I remember the unconditional and judgement-free support I received from families and friends that got me through the various challenges. Therefore, I aim to offer the same unconditional support and judgement-free interaction to all my clients. Through my personal experience, I understand how crucial it is for individuals to develop a strong emotional foundation and a support network, especially those in similar circumstance. Therefore, I strongly believe in journeying and supporting individuals through stressful times, and in working with their loved ones through the strengthening of the bonds within the family unit.

I am trained in the major counselling and therapeutic approaches and also in Choice Theory Reality Therapy and Behavioural Therapy. My work is informed by Person Centred Therapy, Emotion Focused Therapy, and Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy. Beyond children and youth, I have counselled clients in other settings and age groups including young adults and families. I am particularly interested in supporting people in building resilience and skills to cope with stress, anxiety adjustments and overall socio-emotional needs. Given my own personal and work experience, I firmly believe that everyone deserves a chance in a fulfilling life. To better support my clients, I am currently pursuing my certification for Choice Theory and Reality Therapy after obtaining my Masters in Guidance and Counselling at James Cook University.

Evelyn Rochelle Koh

Senior Principal Counsellor, Counselling Psychotherapist, Clinical Supervisor

Master of Social Science (Counselling), CTRTC, EFT, EFCT
Clinical Supervisor & Instructor (Senior Faculty of William Glasser International & William Glasser Institute, Singapore)

Certified Human Behaviour Analyst (DISC)
Certified PREPARE-ENRICH

I developed a passion in counselling when I started out as a school volunteer counsellor working with youth. I saw the transformative power of the counselling relationship on the youths in school and even later in life beyond school. This was a life changing experience for me and I was spurred to setup my own private counselling and psychotherapy practice in 2004. That was a time when there were few counselling and consultation services in Singapore. Since then, I have been working with youths, couples, parents, working adults on their emotional issues and mental health and well-being through counselling and psychotherapy for over 20 years.

Beyond helping my clients within the counselling room, I believe in tapping on the multiplier effect to bring healing and strength to individuals, and relationships between couples and within families. I thus expanded my work and I now devote a large portion of my time towards raising the skills and competencies of the helping profession through lecturing, training, clinical supervision and consultancy services.

My area of passion and specialisation is Choice Theory, Reality Therapy, Lead Management (CTRTLM) because it is highly empowering. I thus find great joy in training counsellors, therapist, social workers, coaches, leaders and managers in this area.  I am also trained in Emotion Focused Therapy, Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and Gottman Couples Therapy and my work is also informed by therapeutic models such as Positive Psychology, Humanistic Therapy, Experiential Therapy and Systemic Family Therapy.

I am grateful to have the opportunity to work with organisations across different sectors, ranging from Youth Centers, Family Service Centers and Specialist Centers to the Health Promotion Board (HPB) and Ministry of Education (MOE). The latter two involved projects where I was able to share my passion for helping youth in Singapore. With the HPB, I helped develop the Peer Support Program for youth and conducted training for youth leaders from tertiary institutions and for those involved in the online peer support network “Youthpals”. With the MOE, I conducted cluster training for school counsellors and teachers on counselling and therapy skills to better help our students.

It is also my firm conviction that all situations of loss and pain can be opportunities for deep healing, growth and connection. I have thus been committed to providing regular training on the topic of “Grief and Loss” to social service practitioners through the Social Service Institute (SSI).

Curriculum Vitae

  • Registered Singapore Counselor with Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC)
  • Registered Clinical Supervisor with Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC)
  • Registered Social Service Practitioner with Singapore Association of Social Workers (SASW)
  • Professional member of the American Counselling Association (ACA)
  • Senior Faculty member as Approved Instructor and Supervisor of William Glasser International and William Glasser Institute, Singapore. At William Glasser Institute, Singapore, Evelyn is serving in the Executive Committee to advocate Dr. William Glasser’s teaching in Choice Theory Psychology, Reality Therapy and Lead Management.
  • External Lecturer/ Clinical Supervisor, Swinburne University of Technology
  • Clinical Supervisor, James Cook University Singapore, Monash University
  • Associate Adult Educator, Social Service Institute
  • Trained in Gottman Couples Therapy, The Gottman Institute
  • Trained in Emotion-Focused Therapy, York University, EFT Clinic
  • Trained in Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy, Canada